Friday, June 26, 2009

entry (17): the freak

You would know this is for you, and by that I would know that we have this common understanding of things unseen.

It is not easy putting things off, yet I left them floating in every corner of my mind. I refer to my "mind" because I do not want to admit that the "beat" is getting faster. I may not be sure of everything but I know there is something between us. So let me be brave in my own comfort zone, in which I tend to write everything that cannot be delivered by word. Maybe I will find myself brave enough someday. Or maybe it is not a matter of being bold; maybe it is for the simple fact that I think, I think I do not know how to love (or even any sentiments related to it) anymore. We would end up like trash. I would rather not risk what little we have of today, for something that both of us cannot commit to in the future. But here you must know, and you should, that I think I like you.

It took me a while to register that, and "no" in case you say to yourself that you have been right all along. No I did not notice you then. No I did not even bother to know you. The truth is that, I do not know anything right now. And it scares me because I know that I have been in a situation like this (one way or another). And I know that it will not take long before my heart melts.